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a fantastic read
a fantastic read
http://business.clairehunterph..
http://business.clairehunterph..

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2007.12.06 22:24
피터팬 죽이기 - 6점
김주희 지음/민음사

열쇳말 : 꿈, 현실, 20대

한 문장  : 꿈과 현실 사이에서, 20대의 모습


 첫 번째 애인과 두 번째 애인 그리고 나

 소설에서 기억나는 인물은 주인공 '나'와 그의 첫 번째 애인 그리고 두 번째 애인이다. '나'의 1인칭 시점에서 이야기를 서술하며, 그 서술에 2명의 애인은 끊임없는 변주를 일으킨다. 첫 번째 애인은 '꿈' 혹은 '다른 세계'를 보게 한다. 그는 밴드를 하고, '게이'이며, 현실에서 적응하기를 거부한다. 두 번째 애인은 '현실' 혹은 '지독한 평범함을 보여준다. 그녀는 직장을 가지고 있고, '호모포비아'이며, 현실에 적응한다. 그 두 명의 애인의 미묘한 사이에 '나'는 놓여있고 자신의 길을 '외로이' 간다.

 사실, 그 2명의 애인을 꿈과 현실 같은 것으로 나누는 자체가 우스운 것일지도 모른다. 그 2명의 애인과 '나'는 결국, 모두 존재하는 '현실의 일면'에 불과한 걸지도 모른다. 혹은 2번째 애인처럼, 사회에 완전히 동화되어 피터팬을 죽여버린 모습을 현실이라고 믿는 게, 더 '비현실'적인, '비본질'적인 것일 수도….

 나는 현실에서 벗어나지도, 현실에 적응하지도 않는다. 그저 살아가고 있을 뿐. 그 모습이 나의 감정의 내밀한 곳에 자극을 일으켰다. '나'는 외로움에 지독히 아파하고 있다는 생각이 들었다.

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